Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Dominic's first crush, maternity leave, and baby babbles...

This past week has been a doosey for us.  Dominic apparently has his first love crush with a girl in his class.  Yesterday his teacher sent us an email that he said in class "I hate you" and the teacher wasn't sure who he was talking to.  In Tim talking with Dominic, he told Tim he said that to another boy, Christopher (*needless to say I changed the name) in class because he hugged this particular girl, Shannon*, too long. When Tim asked Dominic if Shannon was Dominic friend Dominic responded that Shannon was his "special, special, special friend" and that he hugs Shannon a "long, long, long, long time."  Oh boy.

So we (more Tim) talked with Dominic about not saying "I hate you" but use better words like "I'm sad because..." or "I'm mad because..."  To which Dominic told me "I don't like you when you sigh when your frustrated" (which I do when I'm frustrated with Dominic, like when he's supposed to be doing homework or cleaning his toys).  He also told Tim "I don't like you when you tickle Mommy so much."  It's like a switch flipped and Dominic is more cognitive and vocal and trying to be more independent.  Add that to this "new baby in the house" purgatory that he's going through it has been... interesting.  I am actually quite impressed about the conversation Tim and Dominic had about all this.
Kaylee playing with her gym.

Kaylee has become more and more vocal... Below is a video (It's sideways... my apologies! I couldn't figure out how to turn it.. just kindly tilt your head :)  ) of Kaylee "talking" to Tim... Very cute!  Tim and I also swear we've heard Kaylee say "Mama" on a couple of occasions .. mind you it was while she was starting to cry... but I'll take it nonetheless.  :)  We've also started using sign language with Kaylee like we did with Dominic.  We've started using signs "all done," "milk" (or "nai nai" in Cantonese)", and "more."  Dominic still remembers the sign for more and he also has been signing with Kaylee.  We also think Kaylee was trying to do the sign for nai nai last night. Another FABULOUS development: for the last two nights Kaylee slept for 7 hours straight! Hopefully this is not a fluke! I have also scheduled Kaylee to get her ears pierced for Feb 2nd... and I'm nervous but the lady had good reviews and seems professional.  

Kaylee smiling and talking to her lion.
On to some sad news... I got my FMLA paperwork back and it seems my last day of maternity leave is 3/8/13 :'(   *sniff*  It feels like this maternity leave is going by SUPER fast.  I am NOT looking forward to going back to work.  

The logistics of this maternity leave have been brutal.  First, about 2 months before Kaylee's scheduled c-section on 10/22/12 I was notified by my OB's office staff that at the end of October 2012 (about 9 days after the c-section) they would no longer take my insurance. So, my options were either 2 months before the c-section find another doctor willing to take me as a new patient and do the c-section or continue with my OB and then find a new OB to do my 2 week and 6 week postpartum exams.  I opted for the later since I wanted someone I had known longer than 2 months performing major surgery on me.  I loved my OB but the office staff were horrible. They also on a couple of occasions put me down for the wrong appointment day.  While I was pregnant and still working, I had every other Monday off so one day I scheduled ALL of my remaining prenatal appointments and scheduled them for Mondays. So, when I showed up on a Monday and they said I was scheduled for Wednesday I know they goofed.. and they have continued to goof, more on that later.

Another issue has been my Disability checks... When I asked my HR folks what forms I needed to complete for my maternity leave they gave me several forms which asked about disability and my OB was required to fill out and sign. I completed this and submitted it to my HR. No one mentioned separately applying for disability with the State and since the forms my HR gave me had my OB complete a section about disability I thought I had done all I needed... except I never received any disability checks.  A friend, who is also works for the county and was on maternity leave, informed me that I needed to apply separately with the CA Disability office.  So the week of Thanksgiving I applied with the state.  I called the OB's office and they agreed to sign the form.  So I drove it to them, they said they would sign it and fax it to the Disability office the first week of December since the OB was on vacation the week of Thanksgiving.  I check online with the Disability office two weeks later and it says "pending medical provider form."  I call the OB's office and they reassure me they faxed the completed form.  Two weeks go by and it still says  "pending medical provider form." That was on 1/3/2013.

I attempt to call the State Disability office and keep getting this maddening message that says "We have reached the maximum number of callers on hold.  Please call again later." CLICK.  Every time I call I get the same maddening message.  Meanwhile, my paycheck goes down to $600.  I called my HR Disability folks to ask if they have gotten confirmation that my disability claim has been approved since they are reducing my pay.  I'm told they are simply notified a disability claim has been filed but they are not notified about whether a disability claim is approved.  They just assume the disability claim is approved and reduce pay based on an estimation.  Geez Louise that's ass backwards but whatever.

I call my OB's office to (again) check that they have completed their part and forwarded the form to the Disability office. The receptionist says that recently when they were faxing the medical provider forms patients were saying the weren't getting disability checks so it seems the Disability office was not getting the faxed forms.  So, they started doing them online and that seems to work.  I ask "If you noticed a problem with the forms being faxed but it working online did you do my form online?" Answer: Nope.  Me: Seriously?! SERIOUSLY!?!  She says she will submit the form online that afternoon and mail me a confirmation.  I just checked and the Disability office website now says "pending processing" so I see this as a positive sign toward progress. Yet, here it is three months later and no disability checks.  GROWL.

With that I will end on this beautiful note... :)



Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Ear tags, surgery, and first birthdays...

01/09/2013
So... we had Kaylee's consultation this morning with Dr. Rosen at Children's Hospital Oakland (at the Walnut Creek Clinic). I should add this small piece of history: in November we went to the Pleasanton CHO clinic and saw a different Ear, Nose, and Throat doctor who told us the clinic would call mid-December with dates in January 2013 to surgically remove the hanging skin but recommended waiting until she was 3 years old to remove the notch because that one required her being given general anesthesia.

When we never got a call I called the Pleasanton clinic and the staff reported that the ENT Dept. is now at the Walnut Creek office and that the doctor we saw was no longer there... so, we were scheduled to meet with Dr. Rosen, the head of the ENT Dept., this morning. He is recommending waiting until she is a year old and removing both at the same time. He also suspects the notch has cartilage behind it... so, no surgery until her first birthday. We are scheduled to return next September to schedule the surgery.

I think I am OK with that... mainly I'm thinking that gives me time to accrue vacation (which will be depleted from my maternity leave) so that I can take time off while she is healing. I think my only worry is at a year old she will be able to better comprehend what is happening (and she'll probably be pissed because of scariness and pain)... and she'll probably be messing with the area once the ear tags are removed. So, it seems this journey navigating my feelings/emotions/thought about Kaylee having this ear anomaly will continue a little longer...

On another not-so-serious note: the doctor says it's OK to get Kaylee's ears pierced and that will not interfere with the surgery. :)

Tuesday, January 8, 2013

New Year's Resolutions...

Dominic and Kaylee on New Year's day.
New Year... new resolutions.
So this year I have several resolutions... First, to not let this blog go the way the last two did... unceremoniously dead.  The last few months (October-December 2012) were done retrospectively, last night to be exact.  I just started updating the blog yesterday so today is only day 2.  We shall see.

My second resolution is to be less squishy.  A family friend bought us the jogging stroller that we registered for, much to my surprise, so I've been taking the stroller out and going walking.  One of the things I've really started to like is walking with Kaylee to pick up Dominic from school... since his school is right down the street.

Headed to the park with my loves, 01/02/2013.
Happy Faces!

The other big development over the last few weeks is that Kaylee is talking and cooing a lot and is a smiley girl!    Here's a great picture of her smile...
Happy faces!

Kids in our bed on Tim's birthday morning.
Tim also celebrated his 35th birthday on 01/02/2013. He had a pretty relaxing day.. but then it was back to the grind of his work, a blessing that he has been very busy with work!





Kaylee continues to do well.. I weighed her the other day and she is now 12 pounds... a chunker!  She has the cutest rolls of skin and fat on her thighs!  She is still nursing well... too well as she still won't take a bottle.  :(  I love nursing her, please don't get me wrong, but I'm terrified that when it's time for me to go back to work she'll still be refusing the bottle.  I'm also getting nervous... she has her second consultation tomorrow morning with the Children's Hospital Pediatric Ear, Nose, and Throat specialist... this time it's the head of the ENT Department so that's comforting.  When I talked with the office staff on the phone they mentioned that if they can do the ear tag surgery in the Walnut Creek office they will do it likely on 1/24/2013.  I know I want to get it done but ITS . JUST . SO . NERVE . WRACKING.  I know I will be a mess that day.  What's funny is I think I've been on a journey with Kaylee's skin tag... At first I was shocked and worried, then embarrassed about the ear tag, then embarrassed about being embarrassed about my daughter.  When she was just born and probably up until last month I purposely tried to take pictures of only the right side of her face showing... and when we would go out I worried what friends and people would say/think.  Now I don't care.  She is beautiful to me. Kaylee, on the other hand has started tugging, pulling, and straight out yanking the ear tag.

Dominic is also doing well.. he has stopped (for the most part) having potty accidents at school.  We started a reward system where every day he is dry at school he gets a $1 to put in his treasure box.. then as his treasure box fund grows he can buy stuff.. so he bought a game for his LeapPad recently.  He told me what game he wanted to get, I told him how much it cost ($10), he counted out $10, gave me the money, and I bought the game.  I like this because he feels an ownership in the ability to buy stuff because he worked to get the $.  Dominic is still not the greatest listener but we are working on that.  He loves school, doing homework, and is able to read quite a few words.